Throughout the evangelical church, there is a dearth of fatherhood. Men have abandoned their God-ordained role as teacher and leader in the home (cf. Deut. 6; Eph. 5:23-24). As a result, much of Biblical religion has been equated with femininity. Consider the atmosphere of much of our modern worship services. Everything from the flower arrangements and the sentimental music to the topical, therapeutic "preaching" is indicative of an effeminate religion. Is there any wonder then that young boys grow up developing a strong aversion to religious expression?
We should recognize that boys' aversion to the effeminate is not bad. It is reflective of God's creative design. What is bad, however, is the fact that they believe true religion must be feminine. This is a sure symptom of the overall disease of male abdication. On a personal note, as a Bible teacher, I constantly had to meet with concerned parents to discuss their child's progress. Of the many meetings I held, only in a few were the fathers even present! And on most of those occasions, the mother was still the initiator of the meeting. My question then and now is the same: where are the men? How is the local church responding to this issue?
In the program-oriented "churchianity" in which we find ourselves, it should hardly surprise us that the local church's response to this is with another program. Enter youth ministry. Due to the lack of male leadership, our church culture has intuited male leadership through the youth pastor. The problem with this is obvious: it divorces youth from the God-appointed covenantal parent-child relationship at home.
I do not mean this article to simply be a scathing criticism of youth ministry. There are many youth ministries that are Christ-honoring in the way they are done. I will not comment on those. My burden is for the majority of youth ministries that serve as a substitute for the covenantal parent/child relationship at the home. I have a burden for the next generation and that they know the Lord (cf. Judges 2:10). If youth ministry (or any other ministry for that matter) contributes to this goal, I am all for it. Unfortunately, most youth ministries do not even have a goal or a telos. Without a Christ-centered purpose, these ministries become subject to the banality of the outside, adolescent culture. With that being said, let us examine briefly three pitfalls of modern youth ministry.
Pitfall #1: Youth Ministry further separates children from their parents.
I alluded to this earlier and I would like to explain further. For the sake of this article, I will assume that the reader agrees with the Biblical truth that the primary place for instruction and worship to take place is in the home. Sunday Morning is simply to be an overflow of Monday-Satuday. Corporate worship is an outgrowth of family worship and not the other way around. Unfortunately, this is not the paradigm we see in most homes. A good indicator of this is just to ask the question: how many homes practice family worship?
It is the church's responsibility to teach and equip parents to teach their children in the home. This is the Biblical paradigm. Unfortunately, many parents think that it is the church's responsibility to teach their children. In response, the church develops a youth ministry. Rather than teach parents on godly child training, the church simply creates another ministry. Parents, in their unwillingness to assume the teaching responsibility in the home, come to expect youth ministry. Many parents' attitudes towards youth ministry is the same as it is towards daycare: just drop the children off, have someone else raise them, and complain when things go wrong.
Instead of further divorcing youth from their parents, why not have the parents participate with the youth? I remember some of the most encouraging moments in my youth group were when I noticed a son and his father together. Why is this not happening more often? Why is it that the church's youth look no different from the world's in their estrangement from their parents? Why not have youth ministry be a complement to the parent/child teaching relationship instead of a substitute?
Pitfall #2: Youth ministry encourages the trivial and shrinks youth's capacity to enjoy God.
The youth ministry is only an extension of the pulpit ministry so it is no wonder that most youth ministry is man-centered, entertainment driven, and trivial. How many times have we heard someone say, "Youth cannot think on serious matters for long periods of time"? Where does this commonly accepted "fact" originate? It is a lie that emerges from 19th century secular humanism. Youth are capable of so much more than what modern youth ministry is providing. Youth do not need more egg drops, icebreaker games, or men body slamming themselves against walls to garner laughs. Life is serious. There is death. There is the cross. And there is judgment. What are we teaching our youth about the seriousness and solemnness of approaching God? Is there any wonder that "holy fear" is all but gone from youth's understanding of God?
In past cultures, young men were trained to be men and young women were trained to be women. Today, we perpetuate adolescence. We tell them that life is all about games and frivolity. Yet this kind of attitude eventually reaches a nihilistic brink. It should come as no shock to us then when teenagers turn to heavy metal and a bleak outlook on modern existence. We have paved the way for them.
Youth today need what they always need. They need a weighty, full-orbed knowledge of God. They need to see the glorious, majestic, Triune Sovereign who does his will in the heavens and the earth (cf. Daniel 4:35). The only way to introduce youth to this is through a thorough and dense study of the Scriptures. Oh that God would restore this vision to the local church.
Pitfall #3: Youth ministry separates youth from vital, grace-rooted, mentoring relationships with the older men and women in the church.
This pitfall is similar to the first. Many modern youth ministries begin to work autonomously from the pulpit ministry or even work against the pulpit ministry. As a result, the youth are cut off from live-giving, nourishing relationships with older men and women who are, de facto, restricted from involvement in youth ministry. When we separate youth from relationships with older men and women who have gone before them, we are disregarding apostolic command (cf. Titus 2:2-4). The best way to forge and maintain these relationships is to have the youth ministry connected with the rest of the body of Christ. Never should a youth ministry be operating independently from a body of elders. The youth pastor should also direct the children back to the Sunday Morning preaching time, because it would direct them back to the corporate worship service where the older members are present and most active.
In addition, youth ministry would function better if the youth pastor's teaching complemented the Sunday Morning preaching time. I have never understood why this has not been done. How much better would youth's hearts be prepared for Sunday's preaching if they were learning from that text throughout the week? This would also allow for the youth pastor, under the guidance and oversight of the elders, to elaborate or go into finer detail about the text.
In summary, youth ministry ought to serve as a complement to the teaching that takes place in the home and not as a substitute. When youth ministry is undertaken in this way, it will prove to be a helpful contribution to the life of the local church rather than a hindrance. Soli deo gloria!
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